Delicate Flower

I opened a bank account yesterday. It took two hours. Going to a bank here is out of control. I sucked at being Israeli and getting good banking rates for my bank account. I didn't even ask about banking rates, so who knows, maybe I did get good ones (probably not). Oh well.

I got there 30 minutes before closing, and the lady kept fucking things up, and the computer froze, so she passed me over to this hairy guy. This was after closing time already. The hairy guy was giving the weird lady shit for passing him a customer, saying "I was planning a romantic dinner with my wife!" The lady said, "Really, where were you planning to go?" And he answered, "What's your problem? You want to know all about my personal life now? Just go away." Then he made fun of her some more after she left.

Then my cousin and I saw a long-lost relative who also works at the bank, naturally.

The hairy guy had to open my account really quickly before their system automatically turned off, so I didn't have much time for questions. This bank was so antiquated; Shylock might've been my banker for all I know.

I felt like a tool that this guy was opening my account after hours so I didn't go all Israeli on him. That was probably a big mistake, but we have some connections in Bank Leumi so I might go back and un-screw myself over at some point (in case I was ever screwed over to begin with--I seriously don't understand anything about teh moneyz or teh banks).

Israel = the mob, I think. I know I need to be tougher and haggle with people all the time, but sometimes I just don't feel like it. I have better things to do, like taking a nap. And it's not like I didn't go around being Israeli the entire day--I did convince the guard to let my cousin into the bank after it was closed, and some other stuff. But sometimes I just like to sit in a store and let my thoughts wander to topics like "I wonder what Meg Ryan is doing these days" and "if I were a tree, what type of tree would I be?" So I just do that instead of Israeli-ing it up.

I do love that I can say whatever I want to people and they don't get all sensitive and upset all the time. That did not work well for me in Texas. People just go out of their way to be mean to you. I was with my aunt and uncle at their friend's house when their friend asked "Who wants wine? M. probably doesn't want wine because she's such a dork. Doesn't she look like a dork?" Then my cousin said "M. drinks all the time. We gave her all these shots the other day and she didn't even get drunk." (Austin friends know that this is an anomaly, but it did give me a lot of cred with my cousin and her boyfriend so shuttup). And the woman said "That's so weird. She looks like such a dork."

Then I protested about this to my cousin and her boyfriend when we got back to the house. My cousin's boyfriend said "M., you're the girl Harry Potter and you should just get over it."

I also like being mean to people so I approve.