Look at Me, Busy as a Bee...

Damn, I am beginning to understand Israelis' obsession with New Age shit (yes, I am aware that I am Israeli and have always been into New Age shit, but let's just pretend I'm more of a foreigner than I really am and that the New Ageyness of Israelis is new to me).

It's just that you really have to be fucking zen to get through a day in Tel Aviv. Every day, I meet so many people I want to scream at, but I restrain myself. Like the scary frazzled woman on the bus today who was putting her bare feet on the seat in front of me. Or 99% of bus drivers. Well, okay, I guess my frustrations, as usual, mostly have to do with the bus, but ya know.

Thank God I do yoga. (I say this while dressed in full yoga gear even though I decided NOT to go to yoga after I put all my yoga clothes on. Instead I watched TV.)

And to think how much calmer I am now than I was when I first got here. (Did you know I've almost been here 1 year? OMG.) I was basically hyperventilating/crying every 2 secs 10 months ago, runnin round like a chicken with its head cut off.

Despite my current semi-calmness, I don't understand how I'm this exhausted every day simply from riding the bus, sitting in a cubicle, and riding the bus again. How does that tire a person so much? It just ain't right.

Maybe I should start doing meth?

Then I could be like this chipper young woman:



Hah, that never fails to crack me up.

This Is Like the Time(s) I Told My Friends that Instead of Getting Drunk, We Could Just Spin Around A Lot and We'd Get the Same Effect

I haven't charged my iPod in a LONG TIME. Nor have I put new music on it. I've been listening to the same shit since 2005!

The iPod has stopped accompanying me to the bus lately, but I still want to avoid the insane noise of the other passengers (unless they're telling stories like this lovely gem: "so my daughter dated this guy, and he was kinda controlling so she broke it off. Then he calls me and tells me, 'Please talk to your daughter. I want her back.' I tell him, 'Listen, you'll have to talk to her about this--I'm not her messenger.' Next thing you know, he stabs her in an alley! He's under house arrest now." Wait, what?).

So my new tactic is to just sing music to myself in my head! It's almost like listening to real music, but not. The lyrics ain't too pretty: "a rather shade of blaine with a wider shade of grass and this emory bore is giving me a glass." I sound like Pavement, but it's more like crooked pavement with dog poop on it. And the songs all blend together. And many times I end up having some horrible song that I heard at Aroma stuck in my head. But it is environmentally friendly. And I'm still too lazy to go charge the ol' pod.

My bus preparation skills need to be taken up a notch.

Bleerp Blorp

Hey, remember me? I am the writer of this bloggie. Hello!

Here are some things:

1. The degooglification of this blog has obviously not worked. When I Google my full name, I still see my old website all over the place bc a few people link to it. So, if your blog links to my blog, please change the link. (I'm talking to you, Kena! And you, Alex Stein!) I found lots of weird stuff when I Googled myself. For example, I found some Middle Easterners talking shit about me on facebook, because a few years ago I made a facebook group about how it's okay for Israelis to eat falafel. I kind of want to confront these people. I mean, seriously, more than half of Israelis are actually Middle Eastern by descent (including half of me). What are they supposed to eat? Cabbage? Don't buy into Ashkenazi hegemony! And do not deny the good people of Israel falafel!

2. On the bus on the way home every day, I pass by the Bursa. And I look into the windows of the lil skyscraper there. On the third floor or so, there is a synagogue, and I can see a bunch of Orthos praying/rocking back and forth. On the floor right above them, I see a bunch of people running on treadmills. This is my new favorite thing. Rocking dosim with people running on top of them. Heh!

3. Look at me with my new glasses! Beautiful princess is me.